What To Say to Someone Who Lost a Pet

The immense grief of losing a pet is difficult to fully understand unless you’ve gone through the same pain. And even then, knowing what to say to someone who lost a pet is often challenging. After all, you don’t want to “say the wrong thing,” minimize their pain, or rely on platitudes.  

Ultimately, the best thing you can do is speak from the heart by acknowledging their grief and simply letting them know you’re there.  

To help you find the words, we’re sharing some phrases you can use when someone experiences pet loss. 

What To Say When Someone Loses a Pet

You can reach out to someone who lost a pet in many ways, including via: 

• Phone call: If you know the person well, then a personal touch is often the best route, which you can do by reaching out via phone call. This gesture feels a bit more caring, and it gives the other person an opportunity to talk about what they’re going through. 

• Text message: If your relationship is more casual or you typically communicate via text, you can send a condolence text to express your sympathy. 

• Handwritten letter: Sending a handwritten note via a sympathy card is another option. Sometimes a small piece of mail can brighten someone’s day amid the grief, and the extra effort shows that you truly care. You can even include a pet memorial gift or flowers to help ease their pain. 

• Message on social media: In situations where you don’t know the person very well, but they’ve shared their pet loss on social media, you can simply reply on the thread with a condolence message.   

Pet Sympathy Messages 

Losing a pet can bring intense grief and sorrow. After all, our pets are family, and they become ingrained in our daily lives. Their absence truly leaves a deep void, and the pain is very real.  

Here are some examples of what to say when a pet dies that can provide comfort and peace:  

• Losing a pet is so hard. It’s OK to feel heartbroken. 

• I’m so sorry. It’s clear how much love you had for each other. 

• It’s completely normal to feel this way. Losing a pet is like losing a family member. 

• I’m so sorry for your loss.  

• I’m here for you.  

• I know how much they meant to you.  

• You two had such a special bond. I’m sorry for your loss.  

• My heart goes out to you.  

• There are no words that can take away the pain, but please know I’m here for you. 

• I know how deeply you loved them. They were truly one of a kind. 

• You gave them such a beautiful, joy-filled life.  

• They clearly had the best life being with you.  

• If you ever want to talk or share stories about them, I’d love to listen. 

• What a beautiful life you gave them.  

• I’m so sorry to hear this news. You have my deepest sympathy.  

“If you don’t know someone very well but still want to offer your condolences, don’t overthink it. You don’t need the perfect words,” says Seth Schwartz, DVM, a veterinarian for Paws at Peace who specializes in navigating end-of-life decisions for pet parents.  

A simple “I’m so sorry for your loss” is often enough, because letting them know you care enough to reach out brings comfort, Dr. Schwartz says. 

What Not To Say When Someone Loses a Pet

Expressing your sadness and letting the other person know you care goes a very long way. Anything that does the opposite of this—minimizes their pain or fails to acknowledge it—is a no-no.  

Here are some examples of what not to say: 

• Everything happens for a reason.  

• It was just a pet.  

• You’ll move on soon enough.  

• You can always get another one.  

• Be grateful they lived a long life.  

• At least they don't have to suffer any more. 

• It’s time to move on.  

• They’re in a better place. 

• It’s a fact of life. 

• They were old/sick/had bad behaviors anyway.  

• You’re being too emotional.  

• When are you getting a new pet?  

• At least you didn’t have them very long. 

Other Ways to Comfort Someone Who Lost a Pet

A simple message goes a long way, but there are other ways you can offer support and condolences.  

Here are some ideas on how to comfort someone who lost a pet that go beyond pet sympathy messages.  

Honor the Pet’s Life with a Gift 

One of the best ways to move through the grief of pet loss is by helping them honor their pet’s life.  

“You might suggest ways to memorialize their companion, such as creating a photo album, planting a tree, or donating to an animal charity in their pet’s name,” Dr. Schwartz says.  

A gift for someone who lost a pet might include:  

• A picture frame with room for their collar 

• A personalized necklace 

• An engraved rock they can put in their pet’s favorite spot outside 

• A memorial wind chime  

• A remembrance figurine 

Offer To Talk  

Simply offering a comforting presence in person or over the phone can help tremendously when someone is processing a pet loss. That might be going on a quiet walk together or sitting together in their home. 

“In my work with Paws at Peace, I often encourage pet owners to share memories of their beloved companions,” Dr. Schwartz says. “Reminiscing about their pet’s quirks, favorite activities, or funny moments not only helps them process their grief but also celebrates the special bond they shared.”  

Send Flowers  

Sympathy flowers can brighten someone’s day, and this gesture shows you care. Pairing them with a handwritten note can make the sentiment more personal.  

Even a small bouquet you place on their doorstep can bring a moment of peace during a difficult time.  

Help in Small Ways  

Grief comes in waves, and it can often be debilitating. Checking in with the other person and offering to help with daily tasks can help quite a bit.  

This might mean bringing them food, helping with chores around the house, or running an errand.